“When faced with a number of choices I have trouble making up my mind.”
Do you know anyone who fits this description? If someone constantly seesaws back and forth between saying “Should I” or “Shouldn’t I?” chances are good that they seldom accomplish many of the things they want to do. That’s the predicament most Fence Sitters have. They waste their time and energy waiting for every option and objection to be collected. As ideas and choices run through their minds, they become so overwhelmed they don’t know where to begin.

You may have a Fence Sitter style if…

1. you don’t know what you really want. Good decisions are possible only when you understand your values and have your priorities in order.

2. you’re afraid to make the wrong choice. We frequently feel some anxiety both before and even after making a decision. But excess worrying is an unnecessary drain because there is no such thing as a perfect choice or decision. And most decisions are somewhat reversible or open to modification.

*Remember, you can control how you go about making a decision, but you can’t control its outcome. You make the best decision you can at the time and what happens, happens. However, the outcome – good or bad – serves as a trial-and-error learning process that will provide you with the informational feedback that’s essential for growth and development. The outcome of a choice may not be what you want, or even what you anticipate, but if you don’t take the risk you’ll never have the opportunity to move on to a new experience.

( 3) you don’t know how to start moving. Fence Sitters need to create a specialized To Do list for themselves that pinpoints individual steps to be taken, what information is needed to carry forth those steps, and the corresponding deadlines for action.

(4) you’re afraid of the unknown. All too often an unwillingness to deal with change destroys a Fence Sitter’s potential for a chance to do better in the future. In the absence of assured results, though, many people tend to put off forever relinquishing the tried for the untried.

(5) you’re not sure if you have enough information. This is a popular reason. Many people go through life looking for just one more scrap of information that will help them make up their minds. But since you’ll probably never know everything about everything, it’s unlikely that you’ll ever have all the information you think you need to have for each decision. Consequently, waiting till you have it all can be a waste of valuable time.

(6) you have too many alternatives to choose from. When you’re faced with a number of alternatives, it’s easy to be stuck on the fence. It’s important to narrow down the selection as much as possible.

Strategies for a Fence Sitter:

Fence Sitters worry too much about small decisions and can become paralyzed by large ones. Often they don’t know what they really want, and even when they do, they’re not sure how to go about getting it. These tips can help.

1. Learn to evaluate your needs and desires.

2. Realize that in most situations, there really are no “wrong” choices. Any outcome, good or bad, will give you feedback that you can use to improve your decision-making abilities.

3. Break down your decisions into a series of small steps with individual deadlines.

4. Pinpoint your fears so that you can deal with them directly.

5. Use a ranking system when comparing a number of different alternatives.

6. Get input from a knowledgeable friend.

7. Pay attention to your gut feeling.

8. Take time to relax and reward yourself along the way.

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